Pathetic Advertisement of Myself.

 I should start out by saying (and this should be glaringly obvious already) that I am in rare form today.  Tomorrow is the first day of a five, count them five, day weekend for me and I'm feeling a little scrappy.  It's a hoot. Hallelujah for Independence Day (not the movie, the day- the movie creeped me out.)

So, some of you may remember a day when I used to write a blog pretty much every day.  Oh man those were fun times.  Then I started working and had a mid-life crisis and almost died three times in one year... and the list goes on and on and on some more.  So, I stopped writing.  For a long time.  And ever since I have said "Oh, I'm going to start writing again..." and blah blah b.l.a.h.  Well folks, this is IT.

I have been approached a couple of times by a social networking site for bloggers.  They too think I should get back on the horse.  (My words, not theirs.)  They thought it was awesome that I had 10,000 blog hits that one time.  They want me to do it again so they can create a cash cow.  So, since I  have a laid back summer with only three kids rather than my usual 17,000 I think I should too.  And then I'll get really famous and they'll fly me all over the country for the big blogger conventions and I'll get swag and I'll have little advertisements in my margins that pay me money and it'll be AWESOME.  Oh, wait a sec... I mean, it'll be really fun to document the funny happenings of my life for all of you to read.

There's a lot of you that always tell me you want me to do the blog thing again.  And some new friends that claim you log into your facebook just to see the funny postings I've made.   I'm talking to you ladies... (and you too to the 2.5 men that read my crap).  It's time to put your money (not really) where your mouth is and support me in this little venture.  It's going to take you a few seconds to subscribe as my follower on here once I get everything set up and that'll be that.  Then, if you really do read my craptastic musings, you can comment every now and again and prove that you're a real person and not 54 different accounts I've set up myself to make it look like I have followers.  Get it?

Please don't do that now.  I am going to come up with a FABULOUS-O new name and switch blog hosts since this one is the K-Mart of hosts and then I'll do some tweaking(not to be confused with tweeting).  Once that's done, I'll have a grand opening and we'll have a party and cocktails and celebrate.  It'll be super.

Oh- and if you're my mother or my mother-in-law... just pretend you never read this because it makes me nervous when I swear like a sailor and talk about sex and know that you're reading it.  Just don't ever talk to me about this again.  OK?  ok.

Now, I have to go come up with a name.  I'm thinking jabber jaws.  Or lady jabber jaws.  (My cousin used to call my Grammy this when we were little because she jabbered all the time.  It'll be like a tribute to her.  hahahaahaha)
Seriously, I need help with a whitty, quippy, cut to the quick name. Any ideas?  Maybe I'll share my swag with you once I get some as your reward.  Maybe.